Part I: Society
In our society a fit and healthy body weight is favored. And so it should be. It indicates fitness, a healthy diet, and good mental health. But lately there has been a trend around America advocating "being happy in your skin".
Sounds good right?
Not quite. In America 1/3 of our population is overweight. This statistic is rapidly growing. Because of this, it is generally more socially acceptable to be a few pounds overweight than underweight. Yet if someone is a few pounds underweight, they are a bad role model. They are insecure. They are unhealthy. They have an eating disorder. It doesn't make sense. I thought we were all supposed to be happy in our skin. Or did I miss the fine print that says *As long as there is at least there is a minimum of ___ grams of fat under each square inch of it*?
It is easy to become overweight in the United States. Hey, every other commercial is advertising 1/2 Whoppers and there are fast food chains on every street corner. It is also easy to not be overweight. Eat greens bought at a farmer's market. Eat fruit and vegetables. Eat lean proteins. Stop eating your meal and throw it away or store it in the fridge once you are 1/3 full. Drink water. Get plenty of sleep. Get at least 40 minutes of solid exercise a day. Ban McDonald's. Don't eat anything from a package. You will be thin. That is just how it works.
Everyone has different skeletons, bone densities, and different genes. And like it or not, we are all naturally going to be slightly different "healthy" weights.
Television tells women to embrace their "natural curves" (even when curvy is defined as 150 lbs) and publicly condemns women for being too thin. There is no excuse to put someone down for what they look like, whether they are fat or thin.
-Drop Dead Diva and Huge: these television programs on Lifetime and ABC Family focus on a heavy main character who is feeling the pressures of society to be thin, yet ultimately finding peace with her body. That's awesome! But what about a skinny girl struggling to find peace with her twiggy frame? THAT would be groundbreaking. I would love to watch that. Regardless, I am quite looking forward to watching the premier of"Huge" this Tuesday. It has a universal message and I love that.
Part II: About "unhealthy" ol' Me
The heaviest I have ever weighed is 110 pounds. I was suffering from severe depression at the time and would never leave my house for months on end. I had a lot of stomach fat. I stayed on the couch all night and slept during the day. I stuffed my face with unhealthy food and too much of it. I NEVER exercised. I sometimes would be too depressed to bathe for a week. This was severe depression. I was 108-110 pounds at most. This lasted for a year. Then for some reason (Thank you God) I walked out of it. I went back to a healthy diet full of fresh fruits and vegetables and shunned meat, with the exception of the occasional tuna salad. My weight went down to 99-103 and I felt great. I looked better, was more toned, had more endurance and energy, and exuded confidence.
Part III: Thin Like Me
The kids in middle school used to come up to me and my best friend at the time (we were both VERY naturally skinny) and ask if we were anorexic. Even when we said "no, of course not" they would say "Oh you're so anorexic." and would pretty much taunt and tease us about it. Every day after school, we would go home to her house or mine and eat tons of junk food to TRY to gain weight. We simply couldn't gain weight.
We actually had to justify to our "friends" (more like bullies) that we ate more than they did. Could you imagine if your friends made fun of you for having bad skin or being to tan or too light? It is something that someone can't change. (FYI I actually did get bullied for being white and "too pale". The teachers did nothing. But if someone ever made fun of someone for being too tan, they would be in the principal's office or maybe even on the news and labeled a "racist") I took all of this because for a long time, I believed there was something "wrong" with me.
Adults would tell me to "get some meat on my bones".
My mother calls my body disgusting looking, even though I have a healthy lifestyle and she doesn't. I never call her disgusting. I tell her that she looks great in her new bathing suit and to be confident to wear tank tops and dresses, and that her arms aren't as bad as she thinks they are. Maybe I should stop that. This is my body. Why aren't I allowed to be happy with it? Must I first become overweight in order to find "body peace"?
My Big Fat Family
As the first born, I grew up on water and fresh healthy foods. It is what I crave. I am labeled "underweight".
My 11 year old sister, the baby of the family, was parented in a much more lax manner. She had sodas, cookies, cake, and candy along with healthy foods. She has an unhealthy amount of body fat and is constantly eating spicy Doritos and loads of salt. She can't even go on a 2 mile walk with me without getting winded.
She looks "healthy" by American standards, but she is killing herself and my own mother doesn't care. As long as I am not "emaciated", we are all fine.
Has society hindered parent's ability to keep their children healthy? I realize that in this day and age adults are too afraid to grow up (cougars, sugary drink mixes for adults, V8 advertisements pushing fruit flavored drinks for adults who don't like vegetables. Really? You don't like vegetables? Grow up!) and constantly look for excuses. But have they also become stupid and brainwashed? For the most part, or my family anyway, yes:
Mum
My mother is 5' 3" and 150 lbs.
Dad
My dad is 6' 3" and I don't know how heavy, but he is getting heavier at a scary rate. He goes through 2 jumbo Halloween candy bowls full of buttered popcorn in the course of his nightly after dinner movie.
Brother
My brother (13) is skinny fat, 5' 0" and 97 lbs, eats pizza, hot dogs, and fast food as often as he can and never exercises. He doesn't even leave his room. The most exercise he gets is either pacing around in his room talking to somebody on XBOX Live or weakly "galloping" downstairs to ask what's for dinner.
Sister
My sister (11) is 5' 4", 112 pounds, and rarely exercises. She has too much salt and eats microwaveable corn dogs as snacks. I am 16, 5' 5", and 97 pounds.
Me, the skeleton
I take long walks, exercise about 2-3 times a week (I should be exercising more, but I've been slacking lately) and eat rolled oats with walnuts and a Greek yogurt with frozen berries for breakfast, a spinach salad with tuna and lemon for lunch, and the non meat portion of whatever my mum makes for dinner (considering it is baked vegetables and brown rice...our usual "side dishes"), with fruits and vegetables for snacks. Okay and maybe some dark chocolate too.
Moment of Truth
My mum constantly tells me "You look disgusting. You are shriveling away. You look like a disgusting skeleton. I'm taking you to a doctor." And she did. You know what? The doctor said I am fine. I eat healthily and exercise. I have a fast metabolism. I need to get more calcium through supplements, but other than that, I am doing fine.
"Mum, why don't you get some advice on a healthy diet for you and dad while you are here?"
"I'm fine. It's you I'm worried about."
Part IV: Dinnertime, And The Burgers Are Cheesy
At our dinner table: My dad is eating and entire plate of food so quickly, that he doesn't talk. He finishes it in under1 1/2 minutes. Then he has seconds. Maybe thirds. Then he gets up and looks for any extra bread rolls in the stove. If we are having cake (but we never do), he will eat about one fourth the cake in one night.
My mother is picking at her food. She is trying to eat consciously, but is ultimately eating too much of the wrong food groups. She goes for "just one" bread roll. Then half of one. Then another half of one. Then another. She is trying to watch her weight, but has no idea how to eat healthfully. When she is finished, she will lean back, run her stomach and say, "Oh! I ate too much again." ...she blames the thyroids. I tell you, it is one thing to go to the doctor's to get your thyroid levels checked, but it is humiliating to demand to get them re-checked. Then she will get tested for another "it's not my fault I gained weight" condition. When the doctors are positive it isn't glandular, she moves on to the next doctor.)
My sister barely eats anything at the dinner table. She will search for that Three Musketeers Bar in the pantry while we are eating. She is all full from her daily grazing (no, I am not comparing her to a cow. I am referring to to habit of eating no solid meals, but snacking all day instead.) and 2 hours later will spontaneously make taquitos and a corn dog. Then she will look for a midnight snack.
I will eat smaller portions of their too-large serving sizes. I will pass on the white pasta, and instead have more vegetables to replace the cals. and maybe 3 pasta noodles for taste. My parents will start yelling at me (ex. "LOOK at that! That is ridiculous! You need to eat more! Oh what? Are you afraid of reaching a whopping 25 pounds?! You look disgusting. You looked so much prettier when you had more weight on your face. You don't even look like the same person anymore" ...Yeah severe depression and binging is bea-utiful.)
My brother is the worst of them all. I blame my mother. She coddles him. Favor him actually. And my dad is no better. They praise him for eating two cheeseburgers for lunch. He is the only one in our family who doesn't have to eat his vegetables. If we have cheese pizza, (I won't touch the greasy mess) he has dibs on 3 slices to himself. Then maybe 1 or two more. I think that he eats for my parent's acceptance, because my mom loves spoiling him with food and my dad laughs and gives him a noogie and says something along the lines of "That's my boy!"
Women! Go make more food! Tonight I shall feast!
If I comment, I am told to shut up because I am being mean and hurting their self esteem. I word it politely and only say it because I don't want my siblings to get diabetes and my parents to go to an early grave (then again, if they call me anorexic one more time, I might have to do the job myself ;P). They are the ones purposely insulting my healthy lifestyle by making me feel inadequate. Sometimes I wonder if this taunting behaviour and slowly killing my siblings by imposing dangerous eating and lifestyle habits could be counted as child abuse. I then remember, that we are taught by the media to look the other way.
Bottom Line
Fat isn't healthy. High cholesterol isn't beautiful. Starving yourself or eating so much that you feel sick just to please others is dangerous. You need to love your body for what it is and stop trying to please others. Your body is your vehicle that carries you to see the beauty of the world, and if you don't take care of or appreciate it, you might never be able to reach new heights.
Love yourself. Love others. Don't judge others. No matter how well you think you know a person, you shouldn't judge them because the person you are closest to is yourself. And the most important rule is to never judge yourself. Be healthy, be happy, be kind.
No comments:
Post a Comment